I had a dream recently that involved the usual happy potpourri of getting educated, being insecure, making someone cry, and Martin Short. That sounds more like real life than a dream, anyrot, the dream sort of relates to this blogs telos-the bababa-boomdeeyay!
I dreamt that Ted received an awesome degree and psychologically returned to Ted-the-big-brother-at-10, and was lording it over me while I was visiting he and Erin-and-company in Durham. He was very smug and condescending and it made me mad and I think I started to take it out on Erin-and-company. Then she gave me this destructive look, the one right before you start crying, that says ''Are you even human you monster?'' and then we're talking Niagara falls. I made Erin, one of my favorite people on the planet, a person becoming one of my oldest friends, cry because I was a cold and bad person, unworthy of being called Yucky Matt.
I started to do what I do in real life in this situation, try all of my backpedaling tactics at once- a S*#$-eating grin that says ''So you get the joke, right?'', then when that fails, I try to moisten my eyes with guilty tears, and the inauthenticity of it all and my own discomfort at finding myself in this situation has me squirming in my seat.
Ted sees what I've done and gets really mad at me. He puts his arm around Erin-et-al (we are on opposite sides of a picnic table) and she crumples like wax paper on a bed of coals- booh-friggity-hoo, lets call the Whaaaambulance. He looks at me with a withering, how dare you gaze and says- ''Great Matt- now our babies middle name will have to be Sorrow.''
-end of dream.
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ted and erin had a jordan and named it eve--how could this happen?
a glossary of terms
- baba: anything small or something for which we hold affection. has come to mean, quite literally, *the* baba who is the subject of this blog
- babski: baba with an eastern european flair. from watching all the nannies in prague wheel around their charges in bugaboo strollers. they (the babas) simply became babskis.
- cell bundle: what we called the babski, pre-jordan and before the early ultrasound.
- evangeline lucinda: the cutest baby ever.
- fussbot: nomenclature re: newborn existential struggle.
- jordan: the placeholder name for the babski. we thought it was a funny non-gendered name, and monica's enthusiasm for it was infectious
- morgan: the other non-gendered placeholder name that didn't make the final cut. ted couldn't stop saying "big 'm,' little organ," so we scrapped it in favor of jordan.
- pupsandpups: erin and jordan, combined. ted's invention.
- voldy: proud papa.
2 comments:
dear yucky matt,
i think that sorrow is a fabulous middle name. it's also the name of the flatulent black lab who gets stuffed and eventually (almost) lost in the ocean in _the hotel new hampshire_. so really, these are good connotations.
The grand finale makes the whole dream worthwhile. You're a funny boy. Love, Mom
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