when an impulse buy becomes so much more

i think the krogering blog will become a commonly-seen subgenre of our posts. here's one from today. we were in the check-out, and i pointed out a pack of gum to ted. i thought he would pounce on it because we saw a strange commercial for the product before 'the bourne ultimatum' yesterday. once i reminded him of the gum's first appearance in our lives, he became enchanted and told me that it did indeed look powerful. after having it scanned, he opened the package and proceeded to show me the clever way in which the gum was packaged, which had to be nothing but greater proof of the gum's superiority over all others.

the cashier and i shared a knowing glance that said, 'ah, he's your first child, and that melon on front of you will be your second.' i sidled down the lane and said to ted, 'why have a child at all.'

meanwhile, he's capering about, giving me his first impressions of the gum.

the bagger, an older man who we're calling uncle willy because we don't know his real name and he just looked the part, responded to me, thinking that the question was not only not rhetorical, but also unironic. he said, 'so you have someone to love you when you get old.'

abashed, with spearamint-y mouths, we left kroger for the day.